", I kidded her with a straight face.

"I’m sorry, I promise the next time you play, I will watch.", she quickly said, apologetically.

"I’m just kidding Stephanie, it’s actually refreshing to be with someone who doesn’t care about football.", I answered, "Besides, anytime you want to see a game, let me know, we have the National Championship game on DVD at home."

"Oh great, I want to see it.", she exclaimed.

 We finished eating, got back in her car and pulled out of the parking lot. We had only been gone maybe ninety minutes when we pulled back into my drive way. We walked around back and came in through the kitchen, Ashley was still watching TV in the family room. We both joined her, I think she was surprised we were back that quickly. I went into my room and changed into a tee shirt and shorts and went into the kitchen for iced tea. When I rejoined the women in the family room they were in a discussion about school. After several minutes Stephanie turned in my direction.

"Could we watch that game you have on DVD ?", she asked.

"Oh I doubt Ashley wants to see that again, how about you just take it home and watch it later ?", I responded.

"No, it’s ok. You can put it on Brian.", Ashley replied.

 I shrugged my shoulders and got up and moved to the TV, opened the lower cabinet doors and retrieved the disc. I inserted it in the DVD player and pressed play. I fast forwarded the introduction and started the disc from the opening kickoff.

"What number are you Brian ?", she asked naively.

"He’s number ninety nine, up at the top of the screen.", Ashley replied to her friend.

"Oh yea, I see him.", Stephanie replied.

 For the next few hours we watched the game, with the ladies exchanging small talk back and forth. For some reason, watching a game already played on film had little enjoyment for me, I found myself always critiquing my effort. I left and came back into the room several times during the replay. Finally the disc ended, I was ready for bed. I said my good night’s and made my way to my room. I’m not sure how long the two of them stayed up talking, I fell asleep rather quickly.

 I received another phone call early the next morning from Ron Peters from Pro Sports Agents Inc. in California. He had made several more phone calls and had confirmed that two teams were definitely very interested in selecting me if I were available. Both drafted late in round one meaning they were both good teams with winning records. With that said, I could possibly be a very late first round pick, or a very late second round pick. The difference between the two rounds meant a large amount of money. Mr. Peters told me he would fly out one of his associates to talk with me in person if I thought I might be interested. I told him absolutely, we set the meeting at my home for Saturday morning at ten o’clock. I knew Ashley would be available, I also wanted to ask Coach Mike if he would consider being present. We set the details and agreed to talk later in the week. Ashley had entered the kitchen during my conversation with Mr. Peters, so she had heard most of the details.

"So you’re really thinking of leaving school and turning pro ?", she asked.

"Yes I am. If everything falls out right, I have nothing to lose. If I come back next year and blow up a knee or something worst, I may never get the opportunity.", I replied.

"What about your education, you still have four semesters till you graduate ?", she asked.

"Mr. Peters told me pro players always go back to school and get their degrees, it’s not that odd.", I answered.

‘Well, I think it’s a mistake, but it’s your decision to make.", she responded.

 Later that day I called Coach Mike and asked him if he would mind sitting in the meeting with me. He answered that he would more than happy to be there, in fact he would look forward to it.

 The rest of the week dragged on, I virtually got no sleep Friday night, thinking of the upcoming meeting. Before I knew it, Saturday morning was here, I was waiting on the agent. A few minutes before ten o’clock a large black SUV pulled into our drive, a man and woman got out. I opened the door and welcomed both inside, ushering them to the family room. The man introduced himself as Dave Phillips, a player agent, the young woman was Cindy Taylor, a financial consultant for players who signed with Pro Sports Agents Inc., both were here to offer guidance.

 I introduced both of them to Ashley and Coach Mike, both sat and we began the meeting. Over the next two hours, I was introduced to the intricate world of professional sports. I was bombarded with information on standard contracts, signing bonus’s, guaranteed money, agent’s commission, financial investments and everything in between. This particular agency not only represented you as a player but offered you investment opportunities for the future. I had to admit I was impressed with their presentation. At the end of the meeting, I was reminded by Dave Phillips that once I declared, there would be no turning back. I would immediately have to retain an agent so that the agency could try and secure me a spot at the annual combine workout. They both told me my window of opportunity was closing quickly. As they left I promised to talk it over with Ashley and Coach Mike, they would have my answer by Monday morning.

 I talked with both Ashley and Coach Mike in depth over the weekend, in the end both thought it was probably best I return to school. I slept on it Sunday night, but on Monday morning their comments had not changed my mind. I was going to declare myself eligible for this year’s draft. I called Mr. Peters at eight o’clock and announced my intentions to sign with his agency. He congratulated me and informed he would forward all contracts and paperwork to me overnight, I could have an attorney review them and get them back to him. By the time Ashley woke up and entered the kitchen it was a done deal.

"So what did you decide ?", she asked shortly after she entered the kitchen.

"It’s done, I agreed to sign with Mr. Peters this morning, the contracts are on the way.", I replied.

"So that’s it ?", she answered, a slight annoyance in her tone.

"That’s it.", I answered.

 For the next two days, Ashley was very quiet, I could tell she was upset, I was just not sure why. In the meantime, I called Coach Ray and informed him I would not be returning to the team next year. He was very disappointed to say the least, but he pretended to understand. I then called administration as I was told to do, informing them that I was terminating the scholarship agreement I had entered into with them. I asked for them to forward my complete transcripts to my home, as well as the full requirements I still needed to graduate. Two days later, my contracts arrived in the mail. Since I did not really have an attorney of my own, I knew Mr. Timmons had business dealings and needed legal advice constantly. I called and asked him for his help, he quickly offered to take me to his attorney in town. He set up an appointment for the next morning at ten o’clock. That evening I received another call from Mr. Peters informing me he had secured a spot for me in next weekend’s combine where the best college players would showcase their talents for Pro Scouts and Coaches.

 The next morning I met with Mr. Timmons and his attorney downtown. The attorney read over the contract and basically reiterated to me everything that I had been promised by Pro Sports Agents Inc. at our previous meeting. I was to pay a standard flat rate to be represented by the agency, which I was told was common practice. The agency would also use their connections in an attempt to secure me possible endorsement opportunities with private companies, in addition to autograph signings and public appearances. My agent, who I found out was going to be Dave Phillips, would handle all of my contractual dealings with any team that drafted me, as well as negotiate all terms of my contract. Any financial investments I decided to make with Ms. Taylor’s company was not part of this agreement and should be handled directly with her office.

 The attorney assured me the contract was legitimate and above board, containing no unusual language. The contract stipulated that either party could terminate the contract giving the other sixty days notice. I felt confident with the contract, signed it and arranged to have it sent back via priority mail.

 I had roughly seven days to get prepared for the combine, where I would either help or hurt my chances of playing pro football. The only thing that could really backfire, is if no one actually drafted me. I would then become a free agent, then have to negotiate with a team to try and get a try-out at their training camp. But there was no way, I could return to school if I was not drafted.

 I killed myself over the next week in the gym, lifting weights, running and doing cardio to be in the best shape I could possibly be in at the combine. The night before I left for the combine, I weighed in at two hundred sixty eight pounds. I felt ready, although I was extremely nervous.

 The flight was long and tedious, I arrived in Indiana, met my agent’s representative and made our way to the hotel. That night I was briefed on the various physical , mental and physiological evaluations I would be given over the next week. There would be approximately three hundred twenty five particpants here from all over the country. Each would run basically the same evaluations, the only difference being the position drills each would endure at your perspective speciality.

 The next morning we entered the large domed facility to begin a week of events that in essence could be life changing for some people. A bad showing here could derail any chance of being a high selection in the upcoming draft. One thing that was immediately evident was just how detailed, but coordinated this event was. As soon as I signed in I was ushered to a large room where I was given the first of several written tests that I would take over the next several days. The test was a type of word association test that really made you stop and think about the answer. It was extremely clever and worded so that it was very easy to make a mistake. I took my time and finished just a few minutes ahead of the allotted time given.

 After a short break for lunch, I was interviewed by a panel which consisted of trainers, doctors and sports medicine authorties. They went into detail about any previous injuries I had sustained while playing football. Fortunately, other than the one severe high ankle sprain I had incurred in high school, I had been injury free.

 That afternoon, I was given another written test and I had a drug screen performed, both urine and hair samples taken. By the time I returned to my hotel room that night, I was mentally drained. I ate an early supper and went straight to bed.

 The next morning I was scheduled for the strength segment of my testing. It was a standard flat bench press exercise in which you pressed 225 pounds as many times as you could. I looked at the chart and saw I was scheduled to go at number fifteen, at least I would have a good idea of what was normal by the time my turn came up. As player after player went through the drill it was immediately apparent some of these players did not put in the same amount of time in the gym as the others. Several players achieved repetitions into the thirties, while others barely made twenty. You were allowed a warm-up just before your turn, then you went straight to the bench. There were maybe fifty to sixty spectators in the room watching and taking notes. I was able to get 33 repetitions before maxing out, the highest number thus far in my position group. By the end of the session , I finished in third place, which I was very pleased with considering being an underclassman.

 Later that afternoon, we had the broad jump, vertical jump and 3 cone drill segments of our testing. I finished in the top five in all three drills which I was extremely pleased with. That night I met with the agent representative who agreed thus far everything was going well.

 The next day the first event up was the forty yard dash, one thing I knew from experience, speed is a key measurable in football. I ran a 4.68 yard dash, which truthfully I was upset with, I had been faster. One my second attempt, I ran a 4.66, on my last attempt I was able to pull out a 4.61. I was not happy with my times but there wasn’t much I could do about it.

 That afternoon we did our twenty and sixty yard shuttle drills then headed back to the hotel. The only thing left was our position drills, then the interviews that the teams were allowed to conduct one on one.

 When I arrived at the facility the following morning, I was quickly ushered into position drills by the coaches. One thing was evident, both the terminology and the concentration at this level was above and beyond anything that I had been through before. You were basically told once, you either got it or they by-passed you. I felt I did fairly well considering everything that was thrown at me, I received some praise from the coaches running the drills. We broke for lunch, then I returned for the interview segment with the prospective teams. I scanned the list and saw I had close to two hours before my interviews were to be held. I entered the field area to watch the wide receivers and quarterbacks workout, just to kill some time. While I was standing there a few of the players were tossing the ball around on the sidelines, basically killing time, as I was. I joined in and before long, we were running short routes and trying to make acrobatic catches.

 Because my father had been an All American High School quarterback, I had learned the proper way to catch a football early on in life. You caught the ball with your hands extended, never letting the ball get to your body if possible. You looked the ball into your hands, never taking your eyes off of it. I guess maybe an hour and a half had passed before I headed back into the meeting room area for my interview.

 I took a seat in a small room which a large table and several chairs. One by one, several teams sent a representative in and asked a variety of questions, pretty much covering all aspects of what I wanted to achieve at the next level. Two of the four teams that interviewed me were the teams my agent thought would be interested in drafting me. The other two I really figured to be a long shot at best. With the team interviews out of the way, I was done and figured to head home the following morning.

 I arrived back home the following Friday evening, I was completely exhausted both mentally and physically. I was looking forward to relaxing for a few days with absolutely nothing to do. I went to bed early Friday night, I can’t remember being that tired in a very long time.

 I woke up the following morning about ten o’clock, took a shower, got dressed and headed into town. I stopped and had breakfast at the diner, passed by the gym and was headed home when my phone rang. I answered it quickly, it was Courtney.

"Hey Brian, how are you ?", the familiar voice asked.

"I’m doing fine Court, how are you ?", I answered.

"I’m fine, thanks. How was the combine , do you think you did ok ?", she asked.

"I did ok. I could have done better in a few things, but I did well in others, I guess it all averages out.", I replied.

"Good, my Dad asked me to call, he was wondering.", she said.

"Tell him thanks, I appreciate the concern.", I responded.

"I will tell him, see you later.", she said.

 I tossed the phone on the front seat just as I was pulling into the driveway. I changed clothes and headed to the gym for a workout, I wanted to make sure I stayed in top condition with the draft upcoming. I had a two hour plus workout, took a shower at the gym and headed home. There was roughly six weeks before the draft, it was going to be a time of nervousness and anxiety. My entire future hung in the balance and for the first time, I had absolutely no control over it.

 Ashley had just pulled into the drive seconds before me, she was beginning to unload the groceries from her SUV. I finished bringing in the groceries for her, then helped her put everything away. It was almost two o’clock in the afternoon before I settled down for some lunch. As I was eating the phone rang again, it was my agent.

"Brian, I just received a very strange phone call from a team out here on the west coast. In a nut shell, they are asking me if you would consider possibly playing another position other than defensive end. With that said, I informed them we had been contacted about you being moved to an outside linebacker slot already. They told me that’s not what they have in mind.", he said.

"So what do they want me to play ?", I replied.

"That’s just it, they never went into it. They are just throwing it out there to see if you’re willing to consider it.", he answered.

"Look, I will consider anything to play. Although all I ask is if I am drafted at a position other than end, they at least give me a shot at making the team at my normal position before cutting me.", I said.

"Enough said, I will let them know.", he told me, hanging up the phone.

 I was really taken back, I mean because of my height, I was extremely limited to where I could play. I was not big enough and had no experience as an offensive lineman. Really either defensive end or linebacker was really all I was suited for. A few hours later my agent called me back, he seemed rather excited.

"Brian, look I have arranged for you to fly out and work out for them privately. They want you there first thing Monday morning. I have arranged your flights and transportation. You leave tomorrow morning, you come back Monday night. I will meet you there.", he told me.

"So what is this about ?", I asked.

"I know as much as you do, but it’s worth the shot. See you there.", he answered.

 I hung up the phone and relayed to Ashley what I had been told. It seemed rather strange to her as well, but as my agent said, it seemed worth the effort. I packed that night, got up early, took a cab to the airport and flew out to the west coast. I spent Sunday afternoon in the hotel that my agent had arranged. I was picked up at seven o’clock Monday morning by a transportation service and was taken to the local team’s stadium. I was met by team officials and a couple of coaches, given a locker room to change, then led out onto the field.

 I immediately recognized the tall red shirted player throwing the ball to the other two players casually. He was a highly decorated Quarterback to had led this team to several championships in the past decade. I was introduced to everyone on the field, one of the coaches finally started to unravel the mystery.

"Brian, I’m Coach Reed, the Offensive Coordinator here, all of this mess is my doing. I was at the combine and watched you workout in several drills. I must admit that for your size, you’re incredibly strong, but more importantly you’re very quick. But what impressed me more than anything was what you did with the other players while you waited on the sidelines. You have incredible hands, I watched you catch the ball like a wide receiver.", he said.

"Now granted you don’t have the speed needed to play a wide out or even slot receiver in this league. But we do feel with your height, speed and physical stature, you could possibly make a very good tight end.", he finished.

"A tight end ? That’s something I have never thought about sir.", I answered.

"Well, let’s find out.", he responded.

 For the next three hours, I was introduced to the offensive side of the football for the first time. Several receivers instructed me on the proper art of running routes, how to come out of a break, how to react to the ball. I was taught post patterns, out patterns, fade patterns, and back shoulder throws. I must have been thrown somewhere in the neighborhood of a hundred and fifty balls before the workout was over. I noticed the entire time I was working, several people where making notes, one was actually shooting the entire workout on video. Finally the group all came together at mid field.

"Thank you Brian, I appreciate the effort you just gave. Coach Ray told us you never ever give half of an effort. He was right. Go ahead and shower, the car will take you back to the airport. We will be in touch with your agent." Coach Reed said, shaking my hand.

"Thank you for the opportunity sir.", I replied.

 I showered quickly, found the car in the parking lot and was whisked to the airport quickly. I caught my flight home and was back home just before midnight. Ashley was already asleep, so I quietly showered and went to bed. I fell asleep quickly, I was exhausted.

 By the time I woke the following morning Ashley had already left for school, her spring break well over. I decided against messing up the kitchen, instead heading to the diner for breakfast. After breakfast, I got in a quick workout, then headed back home. I decided to wash and dry a few loads of laundry, I knew Ashley could always use the help. I was just finishing folding the last load when she came through the back door. She made her way to the family room where I was piling up all of the folded laundry.

"Oh Brian, that is so sweet, thank you so much for the help.", she said.

"No problem Ash, I was bored.", I laughed.

"How was the workout yesterday ?", she asked.

"Good, I guess. But honestly, I have no idea how well I did. It was very strange and different.", I answered.

 As we put away the rest of the clothes, I relayed all the details about the trip and the workout. Ashley changed into more comfortable clothes, while I watched TV for a while. We decided to just eat sandwiches for supper, neither of us wanting to clean up a huge mess after cooking. Afterwards as we sat in the family room watching TV, my mind was wandering. I couldn’t help but think about just reaching out and wrapping my arms around Ashley pulling her close to me. It took every ounce of will power I had to resist the urge. That night as I lay in bed, I came to the realization that one way or another I had to force the issue with Ashley. Either we were going to be together, or this nonsense had to stop. I decided to wait until the weekend to play my hand. During the day Thursday I received a call from my agent, Dave Phillips, about my weekend visit to the west coast.

"Brian, I got a call from Joe Reed thanking us for the workout last weekend. While as he said, you looked extremely awkward and rough running pass routes, he was extremely impressed with your work ethic and attitude. He complimented you on being an extremely polite and genuine young man, which I can tell you he found very refreshing. With that said, I have no idea if they will pursue this any further.", he told me.

"Well at least we tried, Mr. Phillips.", I answered.

"Yes, we tried.", he laughed.

 The week flew by and soon it was Friday evening, Ashley was running a bit late from school. I had decided that either way, tonight was the night I was going to confront her. I had already taken a shower, put on some shorts and a tee shirt and trying to mentally put together my speech when she walked in. She had stopped and gotten a pizza on her way home. As we sat at the kitchen table eating, I decided to jump in, head first.

"Ashley, I have to talk to you. I have been waiting for weeks, trying to get up the nerve to talk to you.", I told her.

"What about ?", she asked, not looking up.

"I don’t think I have to tell you what about. You know as well as I do.", I replied quickly.

"No, not really.", she responded.

"Alright then, here it is. I want to be with you, I’m tired of waiting. I’m tired of playing games, I’m not a child. I am almost positive I am in love with you. You’re all I think of all day, every day.", I told her.

"Oh ………. That’s not what I expected.", she said softly, her eyes barely meeting mine.

"What did you expect ?", I asked her.

"You’re in love with me ?", she asked, wide eyed.

"You know very well that I am. You’re around me enough to be able to know.", I answered.

"Is this because of what happened that night on the sofa ?", she inquired, an embarrassed look on her face.

"No not completely. I have felt this way for a very long time now. That night just seemed to make it seem possible.", I replied.

"Brian, I have given this quite a bit of thought. There is absolutely no way we could live together as man and woman. This town would go crazy, I am sure I would lose my job at school. People would think that something had been going on between us for years. I just can’t take that chance.", she said softly.

"So we move Ashley, no big deal. If I get drafted next month, I am leaving anyway. Come with me, no one knows us or our past. You can teach anywhere, you’re certified.", I answered.

"It’s not that simple Brian. I like it here, I have tenure at the school. I’m not sure I want to leave here.", she told me.

 I was getting frustrated and I was getting there fast. I didn’t want to get upset, I didn’t want to come across as a child to Ashley, in fact that’s the exact thing I was trying to avoid. I wanted her to see me as a man, one who loved her as a woman.

"Ash, I have to be honest, I’m not sure I can continue to live this way.", I said, sincerely.

"I don’t quite know how to answer that Brian. I really don’t.", she said, her voice sober and calm.

"It’s not that difficult Ashley, I don’t think it is anyway. We are either together completely or if not, nothing ever happens again between us.", I replied

.

 For the first time since I had brought up the topic, I saw a serious change in Ashley’s demeanor. She tilted her head sideways, raising her brow at me, a frown forming on her face.

"Brian, that sounds like you’re threatening me. Is that what you’re doing?", she asked.

"Ashley, I am not threatening you. All I am saying is I have these incredible feelings for you. I either have to act on them or bury them. There is no in between for me.", I told her.

"I’m sorry Brian, I just don’t see how what you want is possible at this time.", she softly shot back.

"Fair enough.", I answered, pushing myself away from the table.

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